think about
the hot concrete
burning my feet;
the first cool breeze of the season
occasionally grazing my skin.
think of the bright sun,
and all the things i’ve got to do today,
tomorrow, this whole weekend,
the rest of this month and the
last of this year.
i’ll think of anything
except -
I need to write
I can feel so many emotions inside me
blundering around
making me more confused and
distraught
with every passing moment.
I can’t get the words out
I don’t even know what they are.
All i keep coming back to is
I don’t know
I just don’t.
what is messing me up so bad
why can’t I create anything but these
empty fucking poems
that only say how confused I am
and nothing else?
Finally up on Etsy, my Zine! Jay Barry, my bro and amazing artist, and I worked together for most of the summer to create this. We went through over 300 of my untitled poems and Jay selected some to illustrate. There is another one in the works, hopefully.
We have for sale these 25 LIMITED PRINTS, signed, with a drawing from Jay, and optional personalization from Kaleb (when ya order). These are for $25, and they’re 11x8”, printed on glossy paper.
If that’s not in your budget (I get it), we’ll be posting the smaller 5x7” color ones on Etsy soon. They’ll be $10. (If that’s still too much, we might make a B&W version for $5.) More to come. Please stay tuned.
(via ice-nine)
Finally up on Etsy, my Zine! Jay Barry, my bro and amazing artist, and I worked together for most of the summer to create this. We went through over 300 of my untitled poems and Jay selected some to illustrate. There is another one in the works, hopefully.
We have for sale these 25 LIMITED PRINTS, signed, with a drawing from Jay, and optional personalization from Kaleb (when ya order). These are for $25, and they’re 11x8”, printed on glossy paper.
If that’s not in your budget (I get it), we’ll be posting the smaller 5x7” color ones on Etsy soon. They’ll be $10. (If that’s still too much, we might make a B&W version for $5.) More to come. Please stay tuned.
Finally up on Etsy, my Zine! Jay Barry, my bro and amazing artist, and I worked together for most of the summer to create this. We went through over 300 of my untitled poems and Jay selected some to illustrate. There is another one in the works, hopefully.
We have for sale these 25 LIMITED PRINTS, signed, with a drawing from Jay, and optional personalization from Kaleb (when ya order). These are for $25, and they’re 11x8”, printed on glossy paper.
If that’s not in your budget (I get it), we’ll be posting the smaller 5x7” color ones on Etsy soon. They’ll be $10. (If that’s still too much, we might make a B&W version for $5.) More to come. Please stay tuned.
in idle moments
my mind keeps muttering
“I want to go home”
even when I’m in my room
or with my family.
home
as a sense of security
and well being
has been displaced.
I can create a house
in the future
and a family too
but will that sense of security
ever return;
will home
ever be what it was?
or do I have to
abandon completely
this notion of security
and embrace the physical suffering
and eternal longing for something unnamable
that are inseparable from life
in idle moments
my mind keeps muttering
“I want to go home”
even when I’m in my room
or with my family.
home
as a sense of security
and well being
has been displaced.
I can create a house
in the future
and a family too
but will that sense of security
ever return;
will home
ever be what it was?
or do I have to
abandon completely
this notion of security
and embrace the physical suffering
and eternal longing for something unnamable
that are inseparable from life
a fool
i’m a fool
for runny flicks
and crummy kids
and bloody lips
-
a fool in faces
to a dream
and pillowtalk
and you it seems
the traffic kills me
and i can’t afford the gas
as i go place to place
and at stoplights
contemplate
the meaning of home.
i’m sorry for
your shadow
the overpowering darkness
you struggle to leave behind
but can’t seem to shake.
you have my love
but i’m sorry
i can carry none
of your burden.
something’s off.
i fell behind,
overwhelmed by all i need and have to do.
something’s off.
i woke up late,
didn’t even have time
to make tea and i
forgot to flush my shit this morning.
something’s off.
maybe it’s me.
these words barely provide release
and the tears,
even less so.
the cat won’t let me hold her
and i’m trying to get sober.
i should throw myself into my work
but something’s off,
i can’t focus.
my mom quit her job,
and is moving back.
i should rejoice, but
i know what that means.
my grandmother is dying.
in a hospital,
or in her bed,
somewhere
she is dying.
life is wearing me down
it makes me
thinner,
weaker
and more rotten
on the inside
with every day
that passes.
something’z off.
something’s off.
i fell behind,
overwhelmed by all i need and have to do.
something’s off.
i woke up late,
didn’t even have time
to make tea and i
forgot to flush my shit this morning.
something’s off.
maybe it’s me.
these words barely provide release
and the tears,
even less so.
the cat won’t let me hold her
and i’m trying to get sober.
i should throw myself into my work
but something’s off.
my mom quit her job,
and is moving back.
i should rejoice, but
i know what that means.
something’s off.
my grandmother is dying
in a hospital
or in her bed, somewhere
she is dying.
